The Story Behind Girlfriends’ Glasshouse Empowerment
Views from a Rose Colored Glass
People often ask me why I chose the name “Girlfriends’ Glasshouse”. As a child I viewed life through rose colored glasses. I created my beliefs around what I thought life should be. My story telling began from me watching my mom’s favorite television shows such as Dallas and Dynasty. Now if you grew up in the 80’s, then you can remember how popular these shows were. It illustrated women competing with one another for love, money and power. I also watched my family cheer for shows such as The Cosby Show that depicted this awesome successful black family. The father of the show was a doctor and the mom was a lawyer and the children were cool and stylish. These television shows didn’t necessarily mimic my immediate family. I grew up in a loving home but, there were times we could barely make ends meet. My father and mother began to distant themselves from each other which only played more into my confusion. I began to wonder why my family just couldn’t work things out or have the money like the ones on television.
Eventually, my mom and dad divorced. The impact was brutal on me and my family. Being older now, I understand that breaks happen but, as a child I didn’t. I could hear the soft cries from my mother while she lay on the couch my dad just bought her. I began to see less of my dad for reasons I didn’t understand. In that moment I felt scared and hopeless. My views on love and relationships began to turn from optimistic to gloom and doom. To make matters worse, I began to pay attention to the slow songs of women pouring their heart about the love they had lost. I began to align these solemn songs to my experiences which deepened my false perceptions about love. I began to believe that love hurts, love abandons and love never win.
Building Glass Walls
These recycled disappointments led me to build emotional walls to protect myself from the risk of being hurt again. I started to pay attention to the women who seemed to have it all together. You know the ones who can get the most popular guys in school. I watched the videos of the fly chicks that make the boys stop and do a double take. I decided that consciously and unconsciously to replicate the behaviors of young women that were getting attention so I can fit in and get what I wanted. My skewed perception and false identity led me to the same results — disappointment and heart ache.
Placing the Glass Ceiling
These disappointments from failed relationships began to support a story I told about myself. I believed I was inadequate or not good enough. This is just one of MANY false stories I told myself based on my negative experiences. I had no idea how powerful the stories I CREATED about myself impacted my behavior. When I believed I was inadequate, then I behaved in ways to support it! I created limiting beliefs that discouraged me from living up to my full potential.
Breaking the Glass
After enough failed relationships, I decided that I was going to break old habits that were limiting me. I began to study my fears and intentionally change my behaviors. I begin to pray and meditate on the life I wanted, made plans to get it and did it! I started to see immediate results and outcomes. My relationships, attitude and behavior improved. I reached out to my girlfriends to join me on this journey for healing and change. My girlfriends started joining me in my home monthly to share best practices and strategies. Together we empowered each other and held each other accountable to me our individual goals.
I created this virtual house for women like you and me. I have learned that my journey is empowered by the women I interact with every day. I want a place where we can share our personal challenges, strategies and victories. Each of our stories are unique but similar. Whether we are dealing with heartache, can’t say “no”, time management, learning to be authentic or figuring out our purpose; our experiences (whether good or bad) help to shape us into dynamic women! Remember even if you feel broken, you are not! You are simply breaking old habits that no longer fit your journey. I look forward to talking to you. Now, let’s kick some glass!